in the

in the hazy shade of memory
you were covered in white light
a finger raised
as if to say
"all of our dirty laundry comes clean."

pointing at the sky
white and white blended into blue
your raised head was a signal to
do the same

"we all make our lives into this shade
stop wanting
and the light will come."

stop wanting.

i brushed it aside
licked the skin of my arm
(the part before the shoulder)
and tasted the last of you
before falling
into the sleep of day
(the last shade of night)

the curtains close
and a shoulder to bear
marks our remains


our december has come and gone

our december has come and gone
and baby, it's cold outside
it's cold outside and
i won't mind

these veins of mine
won't leave my body
i don't mind
i don't mind

just leave me here to become the moss
that covers the floor
of the forest i've lived in
for years
let me lay me down now
i won't mind
it's cold outside

let me cover it
cover myself
in the cool cool moss
of the last long summer
i won't mind
if fall is what you had

had in mind


weakness bends at the knees

and i'm stuck here forcing
a backwards walk
to a forward march

side front
side back
elbow to elbow
back again and
side side side side
to the knees

hanging around
always hanging around
an email clawed itself into my mind
(your lack of punctuation: always the cliff-hanger to a tragic ending.)

and what little time have we really spent
on anything beyond
the Anyway. Nevermind.
about us, about
us? (false positive equals definite negative.)

sleep watches itself lie
and breath sings its own volumes to sleep

tell me when this is over
quiet operator.